Lent - More Than "Patch" Work

I write on the night of Ash Wednesday from the Seminary of the Immaculate Conception. We are winding up our Ash Wednesday Day of Quiet.  It’s a day here that is a radical contrast to most Catholic Churches today. Instead of thousands coming to the Church, we gather as a community of thirty or so to begin Lent in a solemn and contemplative way.  I wonder if the experiences of the Seminary today  might give each of us some good insight and ideas.

Msgr. Fink preaches on Good Friday, 2010.

Our day began, as most mornings do, with Morning Prayer. Msgr. Fink, the Director of Spiritual Formation and my Spiritual Director, presided and preached at Morning Prayer.  He spoke about the three traditions of the Lenten season – prayer, fasting and almsgiving. These are all things we try – in one way or another – to more actively engage in during Lent.  For example, today is a day of fast and we abstain from meat. We tend to pray more, publicly and privately. We often “go the extra mile” to help the other during the season. All good things! Msgr. Fink’s challenge acknowledged the goodness of these things. However, the hope of the Lenten journey is that these are not just Lenten things – or things that we add on for 40 days – but actions and habits that become a real part of our lives.  That they not just be “patches” but become part of the tapestry of who we are and who we seek to become.

We continued in silence after Morning Prayer and throughout the day, including meals. I have come to see the need for and to love the quiet in my life. It’s not something I can do all the time, but there’s a great value to it on so many levels.  There are fewer distractions and it makes it easier to focus. There are times, though, we need to be called to it. Even this morning, I spoke to a friend and said, “Let’s talk a little more about what we spoke about yesterday after lunch.” To which he replied, “I cannot speak to you today, I need to get myself together.” A good reminder for me!  How easy it is to slip out of the silence.

Bishop Murphy leads Ash Wednesday Prayer Services at St. John's.

During the day, too, we had the opportunity to go to Confession, to make appointments with our Spiritual Director or other faculty members to talk about whatever was on our mind or what we would like to work on in the upcoming season.  Bishop Murphy visited the Seminary today as he has done on Ash Wednesday for the last 10 years. It’s become a tradition for Bishop Murphy to begin his day at St. John the Baptist Diocesan High School in the morning and the Seminary in the afternoon. So for the past 10 years, Bishop Murphy and I have celebrated Ash Wednesday together – one way or another.

At the end of the day, Bishop Murphy celebrated Mass with us. He called on us to recognize the presence of failure in our lives, our world, even our Church.  In that recognition, we’re called to hope that like a common Lenten hymn contains, “We will rise again from ashes”.  The day concludes with the opportunity for Eucharistic Exposition and we will all gather for Night Prayer tonight in the Chapel.

Ash Wednesdays like today are good but for seminarians it’s probably not something we should get too used as this is one of the busiest days in parish life. Yet, in the time and space we are afforded here we can reflect on the call of Lent to not just add or simply take away things in our lives, but to acknowledge where work is needed and seek to not “patch” things up but transform them.

Happy Lent!

Here is a great video about Lent from Archbishop Dolan! Click here.

Meet the Dean....but quickly!

Msgr. Swiader celebrates Mass in Bethlehem.

Sorry, in advance, for the long post….

In a number of posts, I’ve promised a post about the Dean, Msgr. James Swiader. I have mentioned him a few times, particularly in the posting about the Alley.  Last Friday, we received some difficult news at the Seminary. On June 22^nd, Msgr. Swiader will take leave of the Seminary to become the Pastor of St. Joseph’s R.C. Church in Garden City.  I have wanted to write this post for a few weeks, but putting it all into words is a little tough.

There have been many people who have been a significant part of the journey of getting to the Seminary and managing life here. Without question or hesitation, Msgr. Swiader has certainly become one of those people. In June 2009, the summer before I entered the Seminary, I met Msgr. Swiader for the first time. When he had come in from outside to meet me he began by saying, “I presume you own the yellow truck.”  My first thought was “Oh man, I’m in trouble.’’ I remember coming with a slew of questions, concerns and ideas about seminary life. In the two hours he spent with me that June day, I met a man who provided the first of many times of comfort, reassurance, direction and support.

When I moved into the Seminary in August, I learned that I was on Msgr. Swiader’s alley (He warned me that it was a quiet and subtle alley – that may have changed a bit since I arrived). And during Transition (Orientation) Week, I learned Msgr. Swiader would be my Advisor – a relationship that would guarantee an important role in this journey.

Over the past two years, primarily as my Advisor but also as the Vice Rector, Dean of Seminarians and Alley Prefect, Msgr. Swiader has provided guidance, challenge, and direction in ways I did not anticipate in June 2009.  I found in my first few days when things were challenging, he listened and provided some good advice. He recognizes, often, when certain times might be a bit uncomfortable or overwhelming for me and is sure to check in with an e-mail or invitation to stop by. When I have fallen short at the Seminary, he’s been there to offer correction but never without encouragement.  At times, when loss or difficult relationships or uncertainty about the future has creeped in to cause fear, anxiety or doubt, he’s always provided confident reassurance.

Msgr. Swiader and I are different in some ways. I had to teach him about Jimmy Buffett and he has taught me to appreciate poetry, great literature, opera (people actually go to the opera?) and many other things. What has united us, though, is this journey in formation. When I first met Msgr. Swiader he assured me that formation is not uniform (i.e. the same for everyone) and requires incredible self-discipline and direction. Those words have proven true, time and time again, largely because of his influence.  Time and again, Msgr. Swiader has always brought my focus back to the habitus sacredtolis – that the sense of priesthood is such an internal part of the seminarian’s, and ultimately, the priest’s being that he cannot be himself without it.  In ways dramatic and simple, he has shown that to me from within himself and called me to the same.

The United States Bishops published the Program for Priestly Formation to guide seminary formation and write the following about the Advisor:

They observe seminarians and assist them to grow humanly by offering them feedback about their general demeanor, their relational capacities and styles, their maturity, their capacity to assume the role of a public person and leader in a community, and their appropriation of the human virtues that make them “men of communion.” These same formators may, on occasion, teach the ways of human development and even offer some personal mentoring or, at times, coaching. More generally, they offer encouragement, support, and challenge along the formational path. (80)

I would say, for sure, Msgr. Swiader has done this and more over the past two years. And while life will change in a few months, I hope in some way, we will somehow continue together on this journey.

Here's the alley - from our Ragtime in the Refectory celebration (It was Msgr. Swiader's idea - including the hats.)

Too Attached?

Tonight, Sunday February 6th, I preached at Solemn Vespers. At Vespers, we preach primarily from the Second Reading at Mass.

Reading Text: 1 Corinthians 2:1-5 (An audio version can be found below and the text follows.)



 
 

As I have prayed and reflected over today’s readings, I don’t really want to preach about this reading. You see, it’s not for me. It’s not where I’m most comfortable. It’s not what I want to hear. When I first read over these readings a few weeks ago, I wanted to preach about the first reading. The fast acceptable to the Lord, from Isaiah…that’s what I really want to preach and reflect upon. Think of all things that might be able to be incorporated into that …or Jesus’ proclamation about “You are the light of the world”….the themes there are what I really want to preach about…

You see I’m a “do”er. I like to take on projects get them done. Work an extra job, no problem. Take on a project or assignment, not a problem. Try to help someone by doing something for them or listening, I’d be honored. I’ve been called hyperactive, “too much”, over energetic (and other things, that are inappropriate for the Chapel). Yet, it’s the first reading and Gospel that I still feel better speak to me, are what I need to hear….

Or are they? You see if we’re honest, St. Paul’s words are too hard for us to handle. We can so easily build up the resume or list of attachments– in one way or another – to demonstrate how valuable, how important, we are. We need that reassurance, most times. We can list all the jobs we can do. Or for some us here, we can list and state who we know and who we have met…How many friends and acquaintances we have…For others of us, is it how smart we are and how many classes we’ve taken and grades we’ve earned? Maybe for some we are caught in technology – and we use it for good but we’re attached…For others of us, do we seek status and public recognition and see that as the way to being valuable and important?

These attachments, with reflection, balance and in and of themselves, are not negative. But they can quickly become the “driving force” in our lives. These attachments can easily pull us further and further away from the reality, from the wisdom of Paul, that the value and potential I have is not found in any other place but my relationship with God. We may come to the point when we cannot imagine our lives without our work, status, relationships, grades, recognitions, etc. God somehow falls always in the midst of this. Yet the reality is that there are not enough grades, statuses, connections, names to drop, or intellectual abilities that would ever make us worthy of that love and that Spirit St. Paul reassures us of today.

This is not an easy message. Paul gave it with trembling and fear – the opposite of the powerful preachers of this time. The realizations - of things we do, the attachments we grab on to – get in the way of our relationship with God can bring us to our knees. But if we don’t look at it now, particularly while here in the Seminary – it will break through our way of being, our way of living, our vocation. These attachments of works, peoples, things - will creep in and eventually take us down for these things will not have been built out of relationship with God but apart from it.


On the first Sunday Vespers of the Fall semester we heard from the first Letter to Timothy. The message then was very similar – Christ came to save the weak and vulnerable and to use them for his glory. Today, the first Letter to the Corinthians shares a similar message. While it may be a message that is difficult to hear, as we continue in this new semester, it’s a message that bears repeating again and again and again. We are nothing without our relationship with God in our lives –when that relationship is close and intimate and when that relationship feels distant and detached - it is from there and no other place that we can live and have our being.

As we come to close of this day, let’s reflect on the wealth of Scripture to remind us of this. Let’s make the words of the psalm we prayed this morning our prayer each day – “O God, you are my God, for you I long” (Psalm 63). If the desire of the psalmist truly becomes ours, our attachments will not be distractions or controlling but rather aids and means of support and as we call out to the Lord and he responds, “Here I am!” (First Reading from Sunday's Mass) and we go forth, in relationship with him - to be his “light for the world” and his “salt of the earth.” (Gospel at Sunday Mass).

On Retreat

This week, seminarians returned to the Seminary for the beginning of the Spring Semester (more to come on that in next week’s post). Returning back to the “routine” of seminary life cannot help but force me to think back over other experiences over the break.



A view of the grounds at Mount Saviour Monastery.

During the first week of January, five other seminarians and I had the opportunity to spend a week of retrea at Mount Saviour Monastery near Elmira, NY. This is a Benedictine monastery that opened in the 1951. (You can read more about the monastery here and see some nice videos here.) Today, nine monks live in the monastery and spend their entire day from early morning to night – literally – in a spirit of work and prayer.

Their routine is a bit different than ours. There are great differences between seminaries and monasteries, for sure. Each day in the Monastery began with Vigils at 4:45 A.M. (no, that’s not a misprint!). Here the monks recite the psalms, listen to a reading from Scripture and a reading from the writings of great saint or monk. Then, we gathered again for Lauds, or Morning Prayer, in the Chapel, followed by a silent breakfast. Mass is celebrated at 9:00 A.M. The community gathers again for Sext – Midday prayer – followed by a silent lunch and then, again, at 3 P.M. for None – Midafternoon prayer. Dinner is served at 5:30 P.M., again in silence, followed by Vespers – Evening Prayer – at 6:30. The day concludes with Compline – Night Prayer – at 8:15 P.M. Needless to say there is a lot of praying in the monastery!

This statue  is a 14th century statue of Our Lady Queen of Peace brought over from France. It is in the Crypt at Mount Saviour. Each day, people come and bring their intentions and prayers.

What fills in the “gaps” of time between the prayer that marks the entire day? Monks pray and study at different points of the day. They also work throughout the day supporting the community in a number of ways. The monks at this monastery produce products like apple juice and honey and sell it as a means of producing some revenue for the monastery. They “raise sheep” (?) and then sell the wool at the market. They welcome and provide tremendous hospitality to guests like us. And, from an outside observer, they do work. Yet there is a peace about what they do. While there is much to do, the pace is leads one to say their work is a form of prayer.

The week on retreat was a powerful one for me. I find that when surrounded by silence, it’s a little easier to go deeper in prayer and reflection. The life of a monastery provides the time and space that I need for that to happen. Throughout this week, we also bore witness to a different sense of community that we may know in our own lives. The monks clearly respect and care for one another while also acknowledging the challenges and difficulties that community life can present. In these and many ways, the week on retreat provided much to think, reflect and pray about. I hope I can carry even just some of what I have gained into the weeks and months ahead in the Seminary.

The Chapel at night.

In The Hospital

The Christmas break provides seminarians with some time away from the seminary to do many things. Taking a step away from the routine and rituals of the Seminary allows some seminarians to return to their local communities – to be nourished and strengthened and to also contribute as well.

Over the past number of years, I have had the privilege of working as a social worker at Good Samaritan Hospital in West Islip. (You can read more about the hospital by clicking on the link.).  Before coming to the Seminary, I would work as an “on-call” social worker during vacations from school (Christmas Recess, Winter Recess, summer, etc.). Since coming to the Seminary, I’m not able to be as present as I once was, but can still contribute during these extended times off.

Hospital social work is, at the same time, both challenging and exhilarating.   It is challenging because you are handling some of the most difficult issues of a patient’s life – his or her social issues. In a “typical” day, a hospital social worker may assist a family with placing a loved one in a nursing home, advocating for a patient without insurance, sitting with a family at the bedside of one who is dying, seeking services for someone with insurance, counseling someone with an alcohol or drug issue, providing emotional support to a grieving family, among many other issues.  Unfortunately, there aren’t always a lot of victories and there are times – even when you only work a few times a year -when you see some of the same people again and again, managing some of the same issues and problems.

It is exhilarating because, in some way, you seek to make a concrete difference in the life of another.  For the challenges listed above, each day usually brings a glimmer of hope. In the position of social worker you can sometimes help someone get to the “next step” or find resources for them they never knew about before or advocate for a person in light of some injustice. It may not be bringing closure to a long standing issue, but it might be listening to someone who hasn’t felt they’ve been listened to, it might be helping someone to see the potential within, or it might even be doing something to bring a smile to someone’s face who hasn’t found a reason to smile in a long time.    While it is not pastoral work in the same sense as hospital chaplaincy, it is pastoral in many, many ways.

It is also exhilarating because of who I am able to work with.  When studying in Social Work, I interned at Good Samaritan Hospital and many of the people who helped to train me as a social worker a few years ago are still present to support and encourage me – not only as a social worker, or a seminarian (which they’re excited about!), but as a person who is constantly seeking to answer God’s call in his life.  Again, as I ended last week, how blessed am I!

Christmas Recess - Coming Home

The Christmas Recess has been filled with many blessings – including reuniting with family and friends, returning to hospital ministry, praying with fellow seminarians in the Syro-Malankara Rite of the Church, a week of retreat at Mount Saviour Monastery near Elmira, NY and much more! 

The 2010 OLL Christmas Pageant!

 One of the highlights of the Christmas Recess for me is returning to my parish home – Our Lady of Lourdes R.C. Church in West Islip.  It is this community, among others, that sent me forth to pursue the seminary and priestly formation. I have the chance to return, at times, for Daily Mass, Saturday evening Mass, some parish events, and on Home Weekends. I never fail to leave affirmed, encouraged and supported by the people of God in West Islip.

This year, because of our break and my schedule, I had the opportunity to spend time in a different way at OLL.  In many ways, this was the first time I went “public” since becoming an Acolyte in October.  My work in the past as Coordinator of Worship involved, primarily, “behind the scenes” work which I love.  This year, at the invitation of my pastor, Fr. Mike Vetrano, I served at some Christmas Masses and had the opportunity to offer a reflection on the Feast of the Holy Family (hours before the great blizzard).

It is very humbling, for me, to have the opportunity to serve in a parish community, most especially the one that has given so much to me.  Serving publicly brings with it new feelings and emotions.  First, it can be difficult to be “in front” at times. It’s necessary and it’s certainly something I’m more comfortable with as the years have gone by, but it’s an adjustment from much of the “behind the scenes” work.  Second, initially, it can be nerve wracking and it probably shows. I know this because one of the servers – who I trained when I worked in the parish said to me – “Relax, you’re too tense!” (As I said, humbling.) Third, it is, at the same time,  powerful to be part of the Church’s liturgy in this way.  I think I feared that serving as an acolyte and perhaps one days as a presider, would pull me away from the assembly. More and more I am realizing this is not the case. The “one body” still prays together.

In addition to these experiences, returning to the parish means a great deal to me, personally.  Most days, I pray at the 8 A.M. Mass. In the celebration of the Mass and the quiet time in the Church before, I am able to set a good direction for the day. And, I am automatically reminded that I do not journey alone.  Throughout these weeks, it has also been good for me to just be part of some of parish life – whether it be attending the Christmas Pageant (with some seminary friends), helping to prepare and some of the Christmas liturgies, talking and sharing life with members of the community or being one of many to put all those Christmas decorations away – to remember that this is what has, in large part, brought me to this point in my life and continues to encourage and strengthen me along the way. How blessed am I!

Have a great week!

Catching Up

Greetings from Long Island! I have much to tell you about the past few weeks in upcoming blogs.  For now, I invite you to check out a different blog - In the Footsteps of Jesus.  This blog follows the members of the Seminary community journeying throughout the Holy Land for the next two weeks.

Last year, I had the opportunity to participate in this pilgrimage and it was a life-changing experience. Try to follow their experiences and reflections in the days ahead!